Back to UNC for the 1st time after her passing... that wasn't easy

Today was an eventful day... from our Lady Canes playing in the basketball state championship at the Dean Dome, to a great time with great friends, seeing my buddy Chad since the funeral and Madison getting to spend a little 'kid time' with someone her age.  Her softball buddy Dakota is here tonight and I can hear them playing dolls in the bedroom as I type... that makes me happy :)

All in all, it was a good day.  I'm proud of our Lady Canes for being the Eastern Regional Champions and I enjoyed being with friends.  However, I wasn't ready to handle that ride.  I haven't done it since my last trip with Vanessa when she was 'surprised' admitted to the ER and then into the Cancer Hospital on Feb. 7th through the 9th...

And who can forget the allergic reaction from the nasty socks I was forced to wear???

It brought back a lot of memories from that trip, but it also brought back memories of every trip we had made over the years.  We adopted a 'new normal' and just made her treatment days at UNC kind of a date day.  It was great getting to talk with her uninterrupted during our 6 hours driving time (sometimes a lot more with traffic), and we got lots of time together just talking while getting treatments or waiting for the doctors.  It sounds weird, but we had the greatest time together in the hospitals and I really enjoyed being with her there.  I guess the reminder of what she faced made my attention that much more focused to her, and the time together that much sweeter.

Every sign, building, bump, etc. seemed to make me think of her and some type of memory.  I was doing really good until we passed Raleigh and I saw the Sheraton Imperial from Interstate 40.  I lost it for a few minutes.  That was the place where I first talked to Vanessa and we fell in love at first sight... and with our first conversation that lasted for hours.

Old school flip phone picture:  Vanessa attempted to iron my work clothes the very 1st time we met... she actually made them more wrinkled :)  I wish we had better camera phones 10 years ago, because those first years together were a blast.  Needless to say, but we kinda were instantly attracted to each other from the very first time we met.

I also have some very fond memories of trips Vanessa and I made to the Dean Dome for games, bars on Franklin St., and all around the area... but somethings need to stay private :)

It's amazing all the memories I have from a 10 year marriage... it honestly seemed like a thousand years (in a great way), and I guess living 6 years of our marriage dealing with cancer made us live it a 'little more'?

I thank God for every day I was blessed to be with Vanessa and I miss them so much...

I made it through another 'first' of facing old memories, and I guess it will get easier over time?  Today, however, was not that easy, but I'm glad I went.  I hope my memories will always be this vivid and I hope I never take for granted another day...